Forums: The Ladies Room: Asking Out Over Text?

Sorry, I'm a boy, but I'm posting in here to get advice... Please don't delete this!

I kinda like this girl in my friend group (we all eat lunch together every day) and I'm getting my license soon so I would be able to take her out on a date... I take rejection VERY POORLY and I cannot work up the nerve to ask her out in person. To explain more, my friend group is about 90% people that hate me... They aren't my friends. But they're friends with my friends, so they HAVE to sit with us. Not to rant or anything, but there's a guy that is "slow" who is super mean to me and this pathological liar girl. They would taunt me if they overheard me being rejected.

So would it be bad to ask somebody out over text? I've had her number for a while, but we don't text much. I talk to get at lunch a lot though. Should I try to text her until I get my license or something? Maybe like a conversation once a month or something.

How would you respond to getting asked out over text? D:

Awh Euph, that sucks. :( I have a couple of selfish friends who I know care about me, but they simply can't be bothered to remember my birthday, yet expect me to make a big deal about theirs.

When you have a birthday group, it's always a good idea to make an agreement beforehand that the birthday person sends out reminders a week before their birthday. That way you don't feel weird about doing it - because let's face it, most of us wouldn't normally do something like that. Though... I do have a friend who starts announcing her birthday coming up a month in advance. -_0 But anyway, those groups tend to lose steam as the year progresses, so you really have to have a reminder system in place.

Relationships are funny things, and she's probably not the right one for you, but you never know when cupid will strike!

Euphyllia, I need to run now. But we need to have a talk.

This thread really should not have been in the Ladies Room, and I see several guys posting, so I'll go ahead and give my take on it. I know things have likely changed a lot by now since the thread is old.

When I was in high school, I dated NO ONE. It is my biggest regret about high school. I was so focused on so many other things, girls just weren't that important to me at the time. Plus I figured the hottest girls probably didn't want to go out with me anyway. Little did I know I was probably the hottest guy in school and I think they all probably drooled over me, hoping to be asked out.

Here's the point--in a few years, you probably won't be talking to most of these people anyway. You shouldn't care what they think of you. You might as well ask them out--what do you have to lose? And you have so much to gain. If you get rejected, you can always give the comeback that at least you had the guts to try. The fear of rejection is MUCH worse than actually getting rejected.

Another suggestion--don't ask her out over text. I've tried it before, and it was awful when she didn't respond. You have to do it either in person or on the phone. That way you are sure to get a response. In your case a phone call is probably easier since you seem shy to approach her in person. The likelihood of a "no" is a lot less since she doesn't have as much time to think of an excuse.

lol! Now you're making me want to see a photo.

The Thing said basically all that I wanted to say.

"The fear of rejection is MUCH worse than actually getting rejected." 100% accurate.

Do not ask her out over text. 100% accurate as well.


Just do it in person, what do you have to lose?

Love, if I showed you a photo, you would just think I'm cute, and you would want to marry me.

Are you sure you want to put yourself through that? ;)

Never ask out over text.. phone call is better.. that is.. PS. Thing.. I'm with love! . all that talk made me want to see a pic too!. Although to be fair I won't want to marry you at first site... as I'm getting married this year! haha. but still curiious non the less..

ask her out with a phone call or face to face. the phone call won't be as bad as face to face, but it's personal and more meaningful. face to face or phone call carry more weight then a text.

thing I DON"T want to see that pic. or I'd have to show you one of me. I don't remember that year....er..uh...cuz of beer!

Whiskey, congrats on getting married! I'd like to believe you that you wouldn't want to marry me at first site, but you are curious, and you know that curiosity kills the cat. ;)

It sounds like rackman had a few beers before writing this.

Okay so here's the deal with me friends and life... I knew this wasn't gonna work out and I'm kinda glad it didn't...

So basically the girl, her brother, another guy and me were all best friends and super close. We did everything together. I realized her and her brother didn't really care about me because every year we all get each other birthday presents and they forgot two years in a row.

Earlier this year, the girl started missing a ton of school. Eventually she stopped showing up for weeks at a time, and she was out for two months until she finally decided to do home schooling. She's an introvert so she wouldn't even tell her family why she didn't want to go to school -- it wasn't bullies or anything.

I have mainly all A's at one of the top 20 hardest high schools in my state (public and private, I go to public)... I was in the gifted and talented education program and recently got 2000 on the SAT. Where am I going with this? Well... (continued in next post)

(continued from last post)

All of my friends are a bit, ehm, slower. The 3 I always hung out with weren't like mentally disabled or anything... The girl and her brother were just lazy and refused to do any work. The other guy has focus issues, and he also hates school and homework, so he just doesn't even try. He only has 2 academic classes and some nights he has no homework, yet he still doesn't get the work done. I have 5 academic classes with homework and next year, senior year, I'll have 6 academic classes.

After sophomore year, it became pretty clear there was a gap -- the subjects they talked about versus the subjects I talked about just didn't match up. I'd rather debate physics theories, while they're into drawing space ships from Star Trek and talking about make-believe things like "warp cores" or whatever.

So now it's junior year, it's almost over, yet something happened a few months ago which is continued in the next post...

(continued from previous post)...

Around the time the girl left, everyone just stopped talking. Like literally dead silent. Two other kinds (both with aspergers) who used to eat with us attracted some other kids with aspergers and they all kinda left the group. Luckily my friend from German class and a kid from the gifted education program came and started eating with us, so I can actually talk to people.

So the other guy in the 3 I was close with, I was the closest to him. Within the past month, he's stopped talking altogether. One day he came to lunch, sat down without looking at anyone, put his lunch on the ground and sat quietly staring for 30 minutes, never said a word the entire lunch. This continued the next few days, but then he started talking to other people in the group and ignoring me.

He invited the girl and her brother, through her brother, to hang out with him, loudly in front of me. They discussed it a lot, loudly in front of me. Still wouldn't talk... (continued)

(Continued from previous post)...

I finally asked him if I had done anything wrong, and asked him over the next few days why he wasn't talking. He said I didn't offend him in any way and he isn't talking because "there's nothing left to talk about"... Trust me, he's not in any danger or anything, I just don't know what's going on. He talks to everyone but me.

I never did anything wrong, and I still play Minecraft with his brother and everything. They're good family friends still. I'm still trying to figure this out, this silence thing has happened in the last month.

So to be completely honest, I don't have a single friend that I can hang out with / invite over. I have school friends, but literally no other friends. And I'm not like mean or anything, and not shy either. I just know everyone at the school and have no desire to become friends with any of them. Waiting until collegge to start my social life again. My online social life is wonderful, though. :D

Sorry for the long read, that's like my social life over the past two years.

Long story short, it would never have worked out. I now have decided to not date anyone unless it's serious -- so basically I'd date someone if I could see we had a chance of a future together. So that's gonna be college, hopefully.

And I know that this block of posts from me doesn't relate to anything that could/should be posted in the ladies room, but the above block of posts is basically me complaining like a little girl about social problems so I think it works out pretty well. ^.^

TL;DR... Not gonna happen, don't know why I wanted to ask her out, I can't stand her introvert qualities now, she left school and my close friends stopped talking, I don't know what is happening, the end... xD

Wht a story...u should have a book to ur name..

What the hecketh? Euph, I can only say that it's common for friends to fall away as people grow in different directions. Maybe that last guy finally developed an inferiority complex and is acting out. In any case, you are going to have an awesome time in college. It's probably better not to get distracted by girls at this point.

Thing, maybe you're right; I shouldn't put myself through that. Whiskey and I will stay alive by keeping our curiosity in check. :p

ok ok to MUCh stuff for me to read through.....so here goes!

1 thing is right about the beers, but is there really a set number to rackman's limit?

2 WHOA....WHOA.....WHOOOAAAA....whoa, whiskey is getting married? whoa I need a beer! (like Thats a surprise to anybody)

3 you know there is no body better to keep ya'lls curiosity in check with then me........wait that don't sound right. *opens another beer and thinks*

4 Euph do as what the "elder" ladies say as they are all wise and know all. and get ready to LYFAO as to what they do to me for saying "elder" first.

*opens and drinks several beers while bracing for impact*

DISCLAIMER: DIS MISS ANY AND ALL STATEMENTS AND POST RACKMAN!. THANK YOU AND HAVE A NICE DAY

admins unbehave RACKMAN

Euphyllia I hope all turned out well :(