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Issue 74

Feb 18, 2007

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Issue 1

>> Editorials
Begging - A Poem of Angst

Urbograms oh urbograms why do you hate me so?
There was a time when you showed me love but not now yo
100+ messages a day puts me in a tizzy
But one type of message makes me angry and very dizzy
“Excuse me, I want a saber can you buy my songs?”
Look at the days spent and they haven’t even been here long!
This coming from an unknown
Why is this behavior so easily shown?
Trying to beg me for my loot
Not knowing that I want to give them da boot
Sit them down and tell them of a time when we earned
By playing games to purchase what we yearned
But now it’s all gone like that hay hiding pin
I bet you thought I was going to say gone with the wind
Enough about jokes this topic is fundamental
Working so hard for my stuff has made me very sentimental
Made me appreciate everything that I acquired
Smiling cuz my dedication got me what I desired
Sabers are for those who work hard and not for the boastful
The more urbograms I get begging me for money the more I want to go postal
And although I am not that type of Miss
The next person just might earn themselves a funky and sassy diss

Robo-Pooches need a home too

Most of you all know me Breaker, as a grumpy catlike creature, but only a few of you know my robo pooch A.K.A. GIR...

Earlier this week, an interviewer tracked me down (because of my constant roaming and all) to have a little talk about why I kept my robo pooch...

This is my interview with the...uhh...interviewer.

Interviewer: Thank you for letting me interview you, I didn't think I would be able to, considering you won't let most people near you, but...umm...

Breaker: Well, spit it out.

Interviewer: Oh okay, why don't you sell your robo pooch, everyone else seems to, I mean, I would.

Breaker: Why would I need to?

Interviewer: The urbos of cou...

*GIR rolls in, interrupting the whole interview*

GIR: Do I get my pancakes now?

Breaker: Quiet, you don't eat people food.

Interviewer: Okaaaay, like I was saying, the urbos of course.

Breaker: I don't need them, I'm a nomad.

Interviewer: Uhhh, moving on, is it true that you have another robo pooch?

Breaker: Indeed, but I need to fix the wiring.

Interviewer: Then sell it, it's no good.

Breaker: Excuse me, I won them on Love_Child's radio station, she's one of my dawgettes, and she'd have her heart broken, I can't have my dawgettes unhappy now.

Interviewer: Your loss...

Breaker: Grrrr!

Interviewer: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, thank you for your time.

Breaker: Good, now get lost before I get angry at you.

That was my interview, and I'm still unhappy about him saying that, but anyway, I still have the two robo pooches, sadly, the newest one still needs some wiring, but I don't plan on selling them during my time on Urbaniacs.

GIR: Can I get my pancakes now?

Breaker: No, you don't eat people food!

GIR: Aww.....thanks for reading, article over, BYE!

>> Business
Message for the Newbies

Don't want to get dissed? Confused about the site? I have the perfect answer for you:

It's called Urb Aid (click the picture).

Urb Aid

Read it. Learn from it. Love it!

Speaking of "love," I tip my reporter's cap to Love_Child,
the creator of Urb Aid!

This is Scoop_McFanny saying:

If it's news and it's hot you can expect me to beat the others to the punch!

>> Top Stories
Panties Pulls Prestigious Prize!

Best Avatar Designer in Urbanville:

Iron_Pant's Profile

The Hustle Alliance would like to congratulate Iron_Pants for the wonderful job he has done on avatars and urbopods!!!

Keep up the good work!


MrAnderson, your Affy, and the rest of the Hustle Alliance

P.S. HUUYAAH HUSTLE! (MrAnderson made me say it)

the throne is no longer empty

Well....The vigis have a new queen o.O
Well....We never had a old one,lol

So, what's next? The dishes? hehe...

I've already cleaned her crown and saved her from a deadly trip which could have caused brain damage o.O

It's only been...Ummm....Anyone got a watch my watch is saying 2 minutess...That's GOT to be wrong... Wait! IT'S NOT! AGHHHHHHHH!

Anyone guessed who the queen is yet?
Nope that's wrong...It's MMC!


Beware, she is deadly! Just yesterday, she almost pulled my tongue off with a pair or pliers!

Doesn't sound like her does it?

Avatar Winners!
The votes are in and your homeys have spoken. Like anything else in Urbanville, some drama-fication went down, but in the end, we have the winners of the Urbaniacs Avatar contest. All the avatars are awesome and you best give out some props to everyone who voted for the winners.

The official winners of the popular vote are:

Afro_Chic - 1st Place (An Iron_Pants Original)
Afro_Chic's Profile

Mystical_Moon_Chic - 2nd Place
Mystical_Moon_Chic's Profile

Diddoe - 3rd Place
diddoe's Profile

All winners will enjoy a 15 point Training Pass.

And now for some funky consolation prizes:

usagisailor - is crowned with the sweetest avatar
Fooey is crowned for weirdness avatar
Boyinachickensuit is crowned for quirkiest avatar.
And last is Aboujamradanny gets the "Nice Try" prize.

Thanks again to everyone who voted and participated.

Urb ON!


>> Comics
Quotes Stolen by Zoomer

Don't be so humble - you are not that great.
Stolen from Golda Meir - Diplomat

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.
Stolen from Thomas Alva Edison - Inventor

Note: No trees were killed in the sending of this message, but a large number of electrons were terribly inconvenienced.