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Issue 9

Aug 27, 2005

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>> Top Stories
GETTING A LEG UP ON MARRIED LIFE
It's with great pride and excitement that the entire Urbaniacs crew announces the very first Urbaniac wedding. Who is the lucky Urbaniac member? Well, that member is none other than our very own Tuggin_McGroin! TMG was getting funky a few weeks ago when he officially tied the knot! The now Mrs. McGroin looked stunning in a flowing white dress, while Tugging himself seems to have misplaced his pants! That's right, the party went full tilt in FULL KILT! Mayor DaMan and the entire staff of Urbaniacs would like to wish Mr. and Mrs. McGroin much love and mad props!
MANLY MAN, MAN HIKE FULL OF BOLONEY
Amid protests from several Urbaniacs, including Sassy Jungle Kitty and Striking Viking Vixen, the annual Urbanville "Manly Man, Man Hike" kicked off this weekend.
Super Speedy Dude, Terrible Erratic Bloke, Mighty Cowboy Guy and Afro-Liscious Funk Daddy headed off to the mountains of Urbanville for their yearly excursion. As usual, the testosterone was high but the practical joking was higher. "I've got nothing but Baloney in my mailbox! Pounds and pounds of Boloney!" said Mayor DaMan. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say this is the work of Terrible Erratic Bloke." Still no word on if next year's Manly Man, Man Hike will include females. For further details, see the related story in Trivia Royale
>> Editorials
WALK ON THE WILD SIDE
JenQ Gossip Maven here. In a move which should leave Afro-Liscious Funk Daddy AND Mighty Cowboy Guy STUNNED, Sassy Jungle Kitty has been seen with new Urbaniac about town, Elephantic Gigantic Vigilantic. The two were spotted cozying up to each other after a significant beat down of some crankpot who calls himself Mr. Hater! Hater was quoted as saying "That's MISTER Hater to you… don't confuse me with that other Hater guy." Yours truly followed the rumored couple to a late night karaoke spot where Elephantic and Sassy were clearly feeling "the call of the wild." That's the dish… JenQ very much.