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Issue 201

Sep 19, 2012

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Issue 1

>> Editorials
Quiet September

With the arrival of September and the new school year, Urbanville has settled into a new quiet routine, and I must say that I am enjoying the peace around here.  Except for that one homicide.  But it's under control now.  Unless they arrested the wrong person, in which case we have a murderer loose in Urbanville.


A big congratulations goes out to Zoomer_McTraveller on account of his daughter's wedding. We wish her all the best in her new life.


And now, here are your Chronicles!

High school

* 10:15, Monday morning and Hamo is sitting in his Maths class, bored out his nut. He is sitting behind a young boy called Sam Loyal. Hamo wants to spice things up a bit so he decides to "Play" with Sam*

Hamo: Ugh this class is so boring. Why did I even come to school today. I easily could have lied and said I was sick.

Teacher: Okay class. Today we are going to learn about dividing. We will learn this for 10 weeks then have a test.

Whole class: Ugh

Hamo: Oh great. Another test? I'll probably fail this as usual. In fact, I have a chance. After all, I'm in the lowest math class -_-

Sam: Yay! I love tests. I think it would be great if we learn for 10 weeks straight then have a test. KNOWLEDGE IS POWER!

Teacher: See? Everyone should be like Sam. He's so nice, small, innocent and so smart!

*Hamo mumbles*
If he was smart he wouldn't be in this class, fool.

*Hamo really hates Sam Loyal. He is the biggest teacher's pet there is and is completely annoying. Hamo despises him. After a while of Hamo thinking about what to do to spice things up, he suddenly had a great idea*

Hamo: Heeeeey I know what to do. I shall " Play" with Sam. Ha ha amazing idea from an amazing guy! Okay I think I'll spit some Urbo Gum on him first. That stuff is real sticky and if it gets in his hair, he has a real problem on his hands.


*Hamo pulls out a piece of gum and begins to chew it aggressively. He chewed it for about five minuets*

Hamo: Ha ha. This will be so much fun.

*Hamo spits the gum at Sam and it goes right in to his hair! Woah. Unlucky Sam!*

Hamo: Ha ha ha ha
Sam: Miss, I think there is something in my hair?
Teacher: Oh I'm sure it's nothing. Probably just an itch. It's fine.
Sam: Whatever you say Miss..
*Sam is really scared. He thinks a spider went in his hair and he has a phobia of arachnids!*

Hamo: Now I think I will throw a cup cake at him

*Hamo grabs the sticky strawberry flavored cup cake from his bag and throws it at Sam's head*

Hamo: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Sam: Hey Miss, someone threw something at me! I think it was a cup cake and it is really sticky.
Teacher: Enough Sam. Stop the kidding on and don't interrupt when I am speaking!
Sam: Hmm...

Hamo: Ha! FOOL. Now to throw a dead fish at his head Ha ha ha
*Hamo takes a dead fish from his bag which had been laying there for four months*

Hamo: Take this, sucker!
*Hamo throws the fish straight at Sam. But Sam, unaware of what is happening, puts his head down, causing the fish to go flying straight forward and SPLAT*

Hamo: Oh dear. Oh dear god...
*The fish landed on the teachers butt!*

Teacher: WHO THREW THIS!

Nerd: It was Hamo Miss. He also threw things at Sam!
Teacher: Thank you for telling me. Now Hamo.. MAKE YOUR WAY TO THE HEAD MASTERS OFFICE. NOW!!!

*Hamo looks at the nerd and gives him the "Your dead" sign*

Nerd: Oh...

Latest News

Here we are. In the Urbanville City Center! Live and rolling with our camera crew.
What's the latest news you say? Allow me to explain what's going on.

Over the past week/weeks. The swap meet has been down. Yep. That's correct folks. Nobody can make trades nor can they end or accept bids. Insane! A few urbs complained about their items being transferred to Swap Meet. Love_Child is really on a tight schedule here. She has to make sure nobody has duped items because of the Superspeedydud crisis AND she has to answer questions such as ' When will the trades be fixed?'
Love had to hire a programmer to fix the swap meet. We don't know for sure if the programmer is a regular or not. Let's hope he is so we can get more advanced features. Anyway, the Swap Meet is a complete nuisance and nobody is happy with what's going on. But I guess we will have to wait and be patient, right?

That's all for now folks! Stay tuned in to the Chronicles for more news and updates. Goodbye for now!

Urb Olympics

NOTE: THIS IS NOT ABOUT THE URB OLYMPICS WE HAVE HERE. THIS IS JUST A COPY OF THE OLYMPIC GAMES IN REAL LIFE
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Commentator #1: Hello citizens of URBANVILLE! TODAY IS THE DAY WE HAVE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR.

Commentator #2: IT'S THE UUUUUURB OLYMPIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICS!
Commentator #1: That's right folks. We have over 9,000 urbs participating !
Commentator #2: This is going to be one hell of an event!
Commentator #1: Yep. And only six hours to go until the games begin!

Drynesssss

Waiting........................waiting................................waiting...................... and more waiting............. ooooooooooo finally someone appears. 1 minute later I see I am the only one on the online list. I wonder why that happend........ I remember last month or so there was always so many people online at the same time and it was more fun because then you can do battles, props, have a chat in the forums and that made Urbaniacs more enjoyable, fun and more like a community. I wonder what happend. I am sure when you come online and there are not many people around you must be thinking why no ones on..... right????? I think that most of the times anyway, it might be just me because of the time I come on.

I wonder why this happend.....................then I suddenly realise people have schoooooooooooooooooooool.

Dailey Jokes 2

My Psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion.
he said ok,your ugly too!
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What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
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You're such a good friend that if we were on a sinkin ship together and there was only one life jacket... I'll miss you and think of you often.
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Keep the dream alive: Hit the snooze button.
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A man came to the hospital after a serious accident. He shouted: Doctor, Doctor, I can't feel my legs! The doctor replied: I know you can't, I have cut your arms off.
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You know somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen. It said"parking fine".
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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven eight nine.

Animes

Read further on only if you know what an anime is............

I am a big fan of anime and I have watched quite a few animes in this last year. I have watched One Piece, Bleach, Fairy Tail, InuYasha and many more which I dont know now. I was wondering if anyone in Urbanville knows about more animes they have watched and liked. Message me for recommendations and what animes you have watched and you think I would like it. If you want to know what kind of animes I like message me.

Urb Celebrity JAILED

The famous singer/songwriter Lady Ba Ba was arrested yesterday afternoon on homicide charges. She allegedly murdered the Mayor's youngest son, John DaMan. DaMan was found dead in an alleyway by Funk's Depot. Traces of unusual clothing were left behind; a pair of earrings molded out of used gum and pink stilettos with what appears to be laced with Nerd's Rope. These evidences are being used against the Urbstar. Lady Ba Ba claims that she did not do that, stating that she has been framed. A trial is being scheduled for later this week.


Fans are devastated and are forming riots. Ba Ba has support from each and every one of her fans, but will she prove her claims and regain freedom? Is she telling the truth?
That's all the information I'm able to release to you guys without getting in trouble with the law.