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Issue 164

Jun 15, 2011

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Issue 1

>> Editorials
From Osmeliio's Crib...

I had to send this editorial in via my phone thanks to Osmellio. Apparently he kidnapped me, misquoted me, and still doesn't realize my correct gender.  He's under the misguided notion that I have an issue with his disposition, when in actuality that doesn't factor into his significant detriments.

Props do go to Osmeliio, though, for dominating this issue of the Chronicles.  It does seem that his claims of the Villains being the most active disposition may be true;  at least in this venue.

The Heroes are represented by jodie1995 this week.  She reports on a strange character lurking around Urbanville.  And speaking of strange characters, Magic_shodow has also spotted someone unusual in the streets and alleys.  Strangely enough, the UFO sightings have diminished this week.


Jay_Rawker rounds out this issue with a report on the UrbOlympics. I hope everyone is having fun and doing their best! There are a lot of urbos at stake here!

Villains

Before anything I'll like to let Urbrey_Porter know that we villains don't beg, yes urbrey you heard right we don't beg.. like my minion magic said we are the strongest disposition there is. Also we are the most active disposition there is. We need a challenge, so I osmeliio, am calling any disposition to come and try to take us down. Even the " most powerful " zero zoomer mctraveller can't take us down [ steroid taker ] <== just a little hint =D.. we villains don't need steroids to make us superior over other dispo... ok, I made my decision or you can call it a hit list.. my first victim is the little ugly chronicle writer [ no am not talking about jay ].. urbrey its your lucky day, BEWARE OF OSMELIIO

MUHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

I suggest if you don't want to be on my next hit list you better change your dispo to villains...

ALL HAIL THE HOOF
osmeliio

Villains

WE STAND TALL
WE RULE URBANIAC
WE ARE POWERFUL
WE ARE THE SMARTEST DISPO
WE WOULD BULLY YOU WHEN EVER WE WANT TO
WE CAN TAKE YOUR MONEY AND GET AWAY WITH IT
WE AREN'T SCARED OF NO ZERO
WE ARE MOD

Urbrey KIDNAPPED?/?/?/?

So me and UltraUrb are about to go underground where armand_hammer, spaz, and magic_shodow were having a rap battle.. Since am not a good rapper I wanted to pay armand for some lessons.  If he didn't give it to me i would have to force it out of him..

Ultra: os, this is a long walk you wanna stop by Speedy's Java Hut..
os: sure bro, you're always eating bro, you're gonna turn as fat as the mayor.

As we turned the corner we heard Urbrey talking smack on the villains with SilverFlame.

Urbrey: Stupid villains, stupid Cinco de Mayhem, stupid minions, stupid MOD.
Silver: Hmm thats a lot of stupids hahaha, ok bro I gotta go, I have to hit the gym with Zoomer.  He's gonna teach me some good techniques and good workouts cya later.
Urbrey: Cya, ohh I have to go submit this chronicle in, this would get me a giant trophy to put in my lair..

As Urbrey turns the corner, UU takes a bag and puts it over Urbrey's head and I start to take some body shots till I knock him out..

os: Yo let's take him to my crib
uu: Sure thing bro
uu and I are inside my crib we are slapping and punching Urbrey just for fun..
os: So you like to talk smack on us villains, huh?
*smacks*
uu: Haha you go os, yo ama be right back I have to get rack to come see this
os: Ok

I was searching urbrey for some urbos or some gear but that broke sun of a gun had nothing on him except a paper which said "VERY IMPORTANT ARTICLE " I take it and start to read "Blah blah the heroes blah blah." Hmm this last part caught my attention.. I'll have to keep this..

os: Urbrey is your friend, inside scoop, gonna come rescue you?
Urbrey; I HATE YOU I HATE YOU
os: Hmm that's not gonna help you get out.

rack and uu come in

os: I got an idea why don't we keep Urbrey here and ask for some urbos in return... hmmm good idea huh?
rack: and ask them for some beers 

As rack, uu, and I leave we make sure we locked all the doors and windows....
TO BE CONTINUED....................

>> Politics
The Ministry of Darkness (MOD)

The Ministry of Darkness (MOD), is a villainous group, of which you have to prove yourself to be apart of. This isn't an easy route to success, but challenging.

The MOD, will be made up of a council, a selection of URB's, who deserve the right to be there. To be able to get into the MOD, you will have to prove yourself and complete a selection of hard tasks. We won't just accept anyone, so you will have to prove yourself. The MoD has a group of up to 5 executive URB'S who make the decisions. While completing the tasks you'll be in the Minions.

Our purpose, is to reinstate the Villain name in Urbanvillain, show the URB's around urbaniacs who we are and how proud you are to be a Villain.
Our goals are to recruit many urbs into the MOD, keep ourself active and lively as possible and most importantly live up to our name.

no Urbrey_Porter we aren't begging, you can take this as an advertisement..
and Cinco de Mayhem will end when the great goats wants it to end.. and if I catch you talking smack on us or me, there will be some serious problems, do you remember what happened to scoop for running his mouth like a little girl... if you don't want the same thing to happen to you I suggest you zip it lock it put it in your pocket..

osmeliio

>> Top Stories
Henchling!

Doctor Evil has made a creation of a Kelvin combined with a Char! He hides in other battles waiting until you finish to strike! His might is 120,000 and super power is 30,000 and other stats are the same as a normal Kelvin. He has many nicknames: Kelchar, Burning milkshake, and many many more.

Get stronger Before Doctor Evil can make a stronger creation. Use Training Passes and Equip strong gear to be more of a challenge to the evil creation!

The UFOs are just there to distract you from becoming stronger.

~Magic~

The Teapot Lady?

Is this a new super hero? No one knows. She roams the streets, no one knows who she is. She is covered in a black cape and stays in the shadows lurking behind trash cans and climbing roofs. Is she a villain or a hero?

Please report to the nearest hot dog stand, or hero if you catch any sight of her. Who knows what she could be up to...

MISSING

URBREY_PORTER IS MISSING...

LAST SEEN: TALKING TO SILVERFLAME
CLOTHING: SOME GOOFY PJS

REWARD: 10000000000MIL, THE MAYOR WILL PAY YOU THAT AMOUNT.
PLEASE IF YOU SEE PORTER OR HEAR SOME THING ABOUT PORTER PLEASE NOTIFY THE URB POLICE DEPARTMENT [ UPD ].. THANKS FOR YOUR COPORATION HAVE A NICE DAY....

>> Sports
UrbOlympics So Far

Team Nomadic Tribe 2 is pulling ahead after two games with 16 points! Not far behind is team 3 Cool Urbaniacs with 10 points. The competition is heating up, it's only a matter of who wants to win the 100,000,000 urbos more.

Bumper boats is now on the way, I have a few predictions on this game, but I will not reveal them because I do not want to start a controversy. Next week I will have several interviews with the players in action.